Case Study: How A 7-Year Old Came to be Trans
The dire consequences of a mother's desire to be a good ally.
In recent years there has been a sudden and dramatic rise in the number of children being referred to gender clinics for gender dysphoria—the experience of distress caused by a perceived mismatch between one’s biological sex and “gender identity.” This is likely due to the equally sudden rise of a radical new ideology—gender ideology—which is a set of beliefs asserting that whether someone is a man/boy or woman/girl is entirely rooted in one’s subjective “gender identity” as opposed to one’s objective biological sex. In practice, “gender identity” reflects an individual’s affinity to, or rejection of, masculine and/or feminine stereotypes.
This truly radical reconceptualization of what it means to be a man, woman, boy, or girl, does not come without equally radical and harmful consequences. The harm results from the fact that the completely natural and common tendency of some individuals of each sex to exhibit gender nonconforming personalities and behavior is now being incorrectly interpreted as being transgender—a psychological condition that requires treatment.
The current standard of care is called “gender-affirming therapy,” which is the practice of immediately accepting and accommodating a child’s new identity without question or exploration of causal factors. Initially this often means participating in the child’s social transition, which can involve calling the child by a new name, using new pronouns, and allowing them access to spaces (e.g. bathrooms) that “match” their claimed identity. Following social transition, the next step often involves taking puberty blockers to halt further body development, and then cross-sex hormones and surgical interventions such as double mastectomies (removal of breasts) in girls, or orchiectomies (removal of testicles) in boys.
Children are often radicalized into gender ideology on social media sites such as TikTok, and suddenly “come out” as trans to their parents and insist on being addressed by a new name and pronouns. Many scared and confused parents—mostly mothers—go online to seek advice from other parents in similar situations, and private Facebook Groups dedicated to supporting parents of transgender kids are a common landing place. But these groups are invariably composed of activists who emotionally manipulate distressed and frightened parents into suppressing their natural parental instincts by telling them their child is likely to commit suicide if they do not immediately affirm their new identities.
What follows is the story of a mother who indoctrinated her 7-year old daughter into gender ideology and began facilitating her social transition, told through a series of posts to the Facebook Group “Trans People and the Allies Who Support Them.”
On December 30, 2021, a mother made her second post to the 17 thousand members of the “Trans People and the Allies Who Support Them” Facebook Group. The post was about her 7-year old daughter’s excitement at receiving children’s books for Christmas about young girls who transition into boys. She used the hashtag #allies, and in a comment makes it clear that she and her daughter are “not trans, we are just allies.”
Exactly one month later, the mother returned to the Facebook Group to tell them that her daughter now “thinks she wants to be a boy.”
As evidence of her daughter’s boyishness, the mother relies on stereotypes, mentioning that her daughter’s favorite color recently changed from pink to blue, and that she’s now very interested in sports. She further reveals that her daughter currently has a “crush on a girl” when “she previously only had crushes on boys,” which led to “a discussion about bisexuality” with her daughter (as though being a lesbian or bisexual is evidence of being transgender).
Despite all this, the mother says she does not “think her daughter is a boy inside.” She ends by saying, with some trepidation, “I’m a tad insecure that I’ve done something to confuse my kid.”
The mother’s post received 150 comments, considerably more than most posts in the Group. Some of the Group members assured the mom that she should not put too much emphasis on her daughter’s statement. But others were insistent that the mother fully affirm her daughter’s new identity as her “son.”
“Your son needs you to get past what your dreams for your daughter was,” says one commenter. Another aggressively proclaims that “It doesn’t matter that you think she isn’t a boy,” and dismisses the mother’s concerns by telling her she needs to “let go of [her] personal opinion” because “the situation isn’t about you.”
Another recommends taking the daughter to a gender-affirming therapist and shielding her from the father’s justified skepticism by “kicking him to the curb.” In other words, shun the nonbeliever.
A moderator in the Group also suggests taking the daughter to a gender-affirming therapist.
Group members were overwhelmingly in support of the mom accepting and affirming her daughter’s new identity as a boy, saying that ”he is a boy right now, and that is what to focus on.” They also say that the daughter’s identity and pronouns may continue to change, and that it’s her duty as a parent to accommodate every twist and turn in her “son’s” gender journey.
Many of these Group members are transgender themselves. One tells the mother that “it could be a phase till they develop a new realization for who they are,” only to contradict themselves in a follow-up comment insisting that the daughter is “not confused” and that “it’s not a phase.”
The same person also scolds the mom for misgendering her “son,” saying that “it’s best to refer to them by he/him.”
A member says, “Worst case scenario, your child feels more female as they get older and it’s no major loss and no harm done.” The language of “feels more female” and “exploring their masculine side” reveals gender ideology’s complete reliance on sex stereotypes for determining one’s “gender identity.”
Another member utters the common but false assertion that “kids know who they are” and insists that it is “our job to affirm them.” The member tells the mother that there is “no real harm done” to children who are wrongfully affirmed, since they will eventually realize it’s not right for them and stop. But if the mother fails to affirm her child’s true identity, this will likely result in “mental illness, loss of trust, and self harm.” The member ignores a very real third option—the confused child undergoes irreversible hormonal and surgical transition that they later come to deeply regret.
The commenter also claims desistence rates (i.e. rates of people whose gender dysphoria vanishes) are very rare, but this is based on old data when there were more rigorous assessments and safeguarding in place, and children were not being socially transitioned and “affirmed” from a young very age. There is good reason to believe that “affirming” children actually makes permanent what would have otherwise been ephemeral dysphoria. Puberty blockers similarly appear to solidify dysphoria, as nearly 100% of children placed on puberty blockers continue on to cross-sex hormones and, in many instances, cross-sex surgery.
The mother reveals that she is already discussing puberty blockers to treat her daughter’s precocious puberty, and disturbingly adds that this intervention might be “a blessing in disguise,” since puberty blockers are now frequently used off-label in children with gender dysphoria to prevent secondary sex characteristics such as breasts from developing. The mother believes puberty blockers can potentially kill two birds with one stone here—stopping her daughter’s precocious puberty, and allowing her daughter to proceed immediately on to cross-sex hormones should she desire to at a later date.
As you’ve seen, it can be overwhelming for parents to be constantly bombarded with messages claiming with certainty to know what’s best for their children, and that failing to immediately implement their advice will cause them great harm. Alternative viewpoints on this issue are not tolerated, because questioning or invalidating someone’s gender identity goes against the Group’s rules. This creates a tightly-sealed echo chamber where desperate and confused parents are easily manipulated into transitioning their child.
Though the mother had initially expressed hesitation to use new pronouns for her daughter because she believed her daughter may have simply been confused, constant group pressure and histrionics about “misgendering” has caused her to begin using gender neutral “they/them” pronouns for her daughter.
The mother then reveals that her daughter also “wants to be black,” because she thinks black people are “very cool.” She suggests this may be a result of pushing “inclusion among the races.” The mother also wonders whether her daughter’s sudden onset dysphoria “may be an attempt to please me,” again citing her own obsession with “the inclusive movement” as a potential cause.
She admits her daughter “LOVES drag queens and wants to go to a drag storytime,” but is “having trouble finding one” and says the girl’s father is concerned that it might be “inappropriate for kids.” She wonders whether the daughter’s obsession with drag queens and transgenderism may be a form of “rebellion” against her father’s purported bigotry.
In another post, it appears the mother has made up her mind when she says “this will be a painful and confusing transition” (emphasis added) due to her family’s conservative views. She describes the father’s family as “euro bigots,” and says the father predicted that force-feeding their daughter books on transgenderism would “create this exact ‘issue.’” Of course, the mother frames her indoctrination efforts as simply “teaching of acceptance and diversity.”
The mother cares a lot about what people in the Group think of her, and replies at length to every critical comment. She also seizes upon any and every opportunity to verbally bash her daughter’s father. The frequency at which she disparages her ex increases over time in her posts.
She then makes the truly bizarre statement that she has been “convinced for the last maybe 3 years” (i.e. since the daughter was 4-years old) “that they would tell me they are a lesbian or Bi, because they really like playing with my boobs.”
This is the end of the story, as there have not been any further posts from the mother about her daughter’s transition. But this is by no means the end of the story for the daughter. The mother has been gripped by radical gender ideology that’s causing her to view her daughter’s normal behavior through the lens of sex stereotypes to determine if she is truly a girl or perhaps really a boy. This radical lens has also foisted upon her daughter, causing the child to question whether or not her brain is “matched” with her body.
This is the new gay conversion therapy.
Children who grow up to be gay adults are more likely to be gender nonconforming. Proponents of traditional gay conversion therapy view these children through an ideological lens which holds that boys should be masculine and attracted to girls, and that girls should be feminine and attracted to boys. Masculine girls and feminine boys attracted to the opposite sex are therefore perceived as having minds (i.e. psychology) that do not match their bodies, and traditional gay conversion therapy attempted to “fix” this perceived misalignment.
The new gay conversion therapy, based in gender ideology, targets the same cohort of gender nonconforming kids, many of whom will grow up to be homosexual adults. Gender ideology also views gender nonconforming kids as having minds that do not match their bodies. However, unlike traditional gay conversion therapy that attempted to alter kids’ minds to “match” their bodies, the new gay conversion therapy does the opposite—it attempts to alter kids’ bodies, through hormones and surgeries, to “match” their minds.
Both forms of gay conversion therapy are deeply wrong and immoral, but only one of these—conversion therapy based on gender ideology—is being mainstreamed across the country by government agencies, medical institutions, universities, corporations, and social media. This is a medical scandal of truly epic proportions with no signs of slowing down.
The daughter in this story is a typical victim. The mother interpreted normal gender nonconforming behavior in her daughter, such as liking the color blue, being really into sports, and exhibiting same-sex attraction, as being evidence she is transgender. And after giving her daughter children’s books saturated with gender ideology, the daughter immediately began viewing herself as a boy instead of a gender nonconforming girl. It wasn’t long before the mother began socially transitioning her daughter by using new pronouns, and discussion of puberty blocking drugs were being considered.
We share these stories out of concern and hope to bring to light what is happening behind closed doors. Is this 7-year old really transgender? You be the judge.
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